taken off Kak Lyna's blog:
"It's my little adik's birthday! If there is a sibling whom I'm tremendously proud of, it's got to be my little brother below me who goes by a lot of names; Kimi, Imy, Adik, Dan... in the past, Kismis even! Not to say the rest aren't the people whom I'm proud of, I just think he's gone through so much more. We've a 9 years gap but he was the little sibling I was waiting for for years so we were exceptionally close throughout the times we were growing up.
I saw him as someone very independent and had a mind of his own. He always knows what he wants and he works top notch to get to where he is now. Besides my elder brother, Kimi too had to take up something he didn't like in university. I remember the big fight he had with our parents as he was very determined on taking a different course but he didn't have money. He wanted to study what he really liked but he couldn't because our father didn't want to pay for his education if he were to take that different course - and we were forbidden to help. Everyone was torn in between, there were a lot of heartbreaks but he moved on. He continued with his studies, he took up the course our father wanted him to do and he started working at the age of 18.
What he did - you name it. Bar tender, postman, despatch, librarian, translator, delivering flyers but he settled being a tutor for over 3 years. He had classes to attend and he also had tuition classes to do so since many years back, he's gotten used to sleeping only 2-3 hours a day - which for most us is near impossible. At the age of 19 (second year), he has earned enough to pay for his tuition fees (at that time, £12,000) and didn't want our father to pay for his education. I can tell that it wasn't easy - there were a lot of times when he would call up and admitted "yes, it's hard" but that was also something he chose to do. This little brother of mine has always wanted to prove people wrong and to show people if there's a will, there's a way. Hence, there wasn't any hanky pankies in his life - strictly business.
By 19 years old, he was earning £560 a day on weekdays & £1120 a day on weekends (yes, I still remember - and had over £11,000 a month!) ; at that time, it was equivalent to RM3920 & RM7840 respectively. And by 19 years old, he already started to give our parents part of his income (he gave both our parents £2,000 each if I'm not mistaken) and also gave out allowances to his younger siblings. Although he had a lot of arguments with both our parents, I can assure you that never once did he disrespect any of them and I believe with the blessings and prayers of your parents only can he go thus far. He respects them accordingly, loves them tremendously and show them his appreciations constantly.
At the age of 21, he attended Oxford and was scouted even before he graduated from a lot of multi-national companies ; which no one in the family had ever!
He's turned 24 years old today and he's gone so far ahead than the rest but remains to be very humbled and down to earth. He rarely splurges on himself and rather spend on family. He's crazy of responsibilities - he currently pays for our little sister's tuition fees, he gives her allowances, buys our mother her needs, get our father his toys, brings out his nephews & nieces for shopping sessions, sends & fetches them up from tuition classes, sends our grandparents to the hospitals for check-ups... all done by him.
Hence if there's anyone in this world whom I think deserves so much love and blessings from Allah, it's him. He has always told me one thing: "if we think spending 1000 on our parents is too much when we're just earning 2000, then it's wrong. I noticed if I earn 2000, and I spend 1000 on my parents, God gives me double or triple back". Our cousins always ask him how can he still save so much and he would say the key is to not be stingy to your loved ones; Allah will pay you back.
Today, I wish God would listen and grant my prayers - I hope he will meet someone who loves him dearly, I hope he will get so much more rezeki and berkat, I hope his life will only consist of sincere people, I hope God will never lead him astray, I hope he will constantly gain so much more successes, I hope he will live a very long life, I hope never will he have to go through shame and sorrow, I hope God will always enlighten his life, I hope he will always be at peace.
Adik, Kak Lyna loves you! "
-
Happy Birthday, Kimi! My hope is for you to meet great people along the way and for you to be a better person yet still maintains to be the awesome man you already are now.
Lots of love (and hugs) ,
Freida.
Friday, 19 August 2011
Sunday, 14 August 2011
On Races and How They Get in Between.
This morning, I was in Sepang where Hariss, his brothers, some of their cousins and friends went for a friendly race. Apparently, it's the way they bond but I am always his mother because I'll be saying "ride slowly" instead of saying "win!" like some other supportive girlfriends.
Hariss thinks I'm so uncool so throughout the time we've known each other, he's only taken me to watch the race twice. Once when we were just 1/2 months together (there was this GP Race) and another time, today (that's because he didn't have enough time to send me back home). He's generally very into sports and a very active lad but I am 1) not interested in watching that sort of race and 2) I think it's super duper dangerous. And lastly, we never bond when we watch such race together so to have a nice relationship, we try to avoid doing it. ;)
That one time when we were watching the race, I wanted to notify my dad what time I would get back home so I asked:
Me : What time will this GP race finish?
Him : What GP?
Me : Ummm, THIS GP race???
Him : They're not GP riders. They're 125!
Me : What 125? Basically, they're riders, right?
Him : No. Don't you know they've teams? They've MotoGP, Moto2 and 125. You DON'T KNOW that? What do you mean you don't know?!
Hariss thinks I'm so uncool so throughout the time we've known each other, he's only taken me to watch the race twice. Once when we were just 1/2 months together (there was this GP Race) and another time, today (that's because he didn't have enough time to send me back home). He's generally very into sports and a very active lad but I am 1) not interested in watching that sort of race and 2) I think it's super duper dangerous. And lastly, we never bond when we watch such race together so to have a nice relationship, we try to avoid doing it. ;)
That one time when we were watching the race, I wanted to notify my dad what time I would get back home so I asked:
Me : What time will this GP race finish?
Him : What GP?
Me : Ummm, THIS GP race???
Him : They're not GP riders. They're 125!
Me : What 125? Basically, they're riders, right?
Him : No. Don't you know they've teams? They've MotoGP, Moto2 and 125. You DON'T KNOW that? What do you mean you don't know?!
Me : Go Italy!!
Him : So who're you rooting for?
Me : Italy.
Him : How can you root for Italy? You're supposed to choose just one person.
Me : But they're representing the same country. So why not?
Him : This is an individual race..........
Me : Err , okay. I shall root for _______ (someone I cannot remember)
Him : Buuuuut, he's not on the Italy's team.
Me : What? He looks Italian! And I read that he was born somewhere in Italy.
Him : I've a friend who was born in London. But that doesn't make him a British.
Him : Do you think if I get that Ducati, I'll be able to do his style of 170km/h cornering?
Me : What are you crazy?
Him : Why?
Me : Who corners at 170km/h?!! You're supposed to watch your speed. I don't mind if it's just a straight road but corners?!
Him : But racing is all about taking the risks. What are you nagging about?
Me : That lad placed 27th. Why is he receiving a medal?
Him : He placed FIRST. His number's 27! Let's go home. T.T
But I believe it's the little little differences that make the journey even better. :)
Lotsa love,
Freida.
Wednesday, 10 August 2011
On Being 18 Months Together...
Maybe very little people know (unless you're close with us) on how Hariss and I got together. I've this crazy urge to share with you guys our story now that I'm waiting for sahur time. :p I remember meeting him the first time when I was still in college but he's actually a very quiet guy and does his own things and prefers to avoid making contacts with people whom he's not close with. He's an enormous wall around him!
I found through my friend that Kimi was his tutor whom he seeked every weekends. IB was tough and I needed some time off to meet another person who can help me out to meet the points I expected to get. I did my IB in Chaltenham Ladies College and hence I would drive down to London every weekend for my classes with Kimi. We spent 3 years having classes together but I only talked to Hariss twice. Once when I bumped into him outside his house and second time when I met him by chance in Jamie's. We had small talks but that was it.
Through my second year, Kimi had graduated so we didn't meet up until Kimi returned to London for a 3 months visit when I regularly visited his house for lunch or even dinner whenever invited. This one time, I saw him cooking in the kitchen and was amazed at his skills so I was curious and went over. We talked about food, and later on about our families and friends and what we do which had helped a lot for us to bond.
There was this one day when we were seating on the couch at his house, he turned to me and asked, "you know... are you single?". It got me thinking. He never asked! So I said that yes, I was single and he asked why and I said I didn't know. I was single, and happy, and didn't mind. Only after that did he ask for my phone number and later on he always made the effort to text and call over the littlest things like : good morning! I felt the warmth in him and that touched me. Sometimes, before sleep, he would randomly tell me how his days went by and I would share how mine went through. It became a comfortable thing and we felt awkward not telling each other whatever we do in the upcoming weeks! haha.
On the christmas break, I had to go back to Malaysia and so I told him the night before "I'll be flying back to KL tomorrow morning." and he replied "see you soon!" . I didn't understand until he boarded the same plane the next morning - which was too sweet because he bought his ticket right after I told him. :) He met my parents in the airport and my parents were pleased that I made a nice decent friend and invited him over for dinner that very night.
My dad's a very direct person and he said he "saw" why Hariss would fly back with me and asked: so do you like my daughter?
Only my dad does that these days!! I've forgotten how I reacted but I'm very sure I was very embarrassed. He was direct too, and sweet. He said something like "I do. I like her and I'd love to know her more and insyaallah for our relationship to develop. And if you're fine with it uncle, I'd love to be together with your daughter".
Only HE does that these days!! I was stunned and my mom was there laughing. Dad was so pleased over that and said yes on my behalf. Geez! However, I'm happy that I made the right choice.
I love him. I love his family. and I love all of his friends. We respect each other's networks and do not try to intrude to one another's personal space. Still, I'd like to believe we always have each other in our minds. :))
18 months, and I wish we'll have millions more days being together. This seems real and I hope for the best future.
xx
I found through my friend that Kimi was his tutor whom he seeked every weekends. IB was tough and I needed some time off to meet another person who can help me out to meet the points I expected to get. I did my IB in Chaltenham Ladies College and hence I would drive down to London every weekend for my classes with Kimi. We spent 3 years having classes together but I only talked to Hariss twice. Once when I bumped into him outside his house and second time when I met him by chance in Jamie's. We had small talks but that was it.
Through my second year, Kimi had graduated so we didn't meet up until Kimi returned to London for a 3 months visit when I regularly visited his house for lunch or even dinner whenever invited. This one time, I saw him cooking in the kitchen and was amazed at his skills so I was curious and went over. We talked about food, and later on about our families and friends and what we do which had helped a lot for us to bond.
There was this one day when we were seating on the couch at his house, he turned to me and asked, "you know... are you single?". It got me thinking. He never asked! So I said that yes, I was single and he asked why and I said I didn't know. I was single, and happy, and didn't mind. Only after that did he ask for my phone number and later on he always made the effort to text and call over the littlest things like : good morning! I felt the warmth in him and that touched me. Sometimes, before sleep, he would randomly tell me how his days went by and I would share how mine went through. It became a comfortable thing and we felt awkward not telling each other whatever we do in the upcoming weeks! haha.
On the christmas break, I had to go back to Malaysia and so I told him the night before "I'll be flying back to KL tomorrow morning." and he replied "see you soon!" . I didn't understand until he boarded the same plane the next morning - which was too sweet because he bought his ticket right after I told him. :) He met my parents in the airport and my parents were pleased that I made a nice decent friend and invited him over for dinner that very night.
My dad's a very direct person and he said he "saw" why Hariss would fly back with me and asked: so do you like my daughter?
Only my dad does that these days!! I've forgotten how I reacted but I'm very sure I was very embarrassed. He was direct too, and sweet. He said something like "I do. I like her and I'd love to know her more and insyaallah for our relationship to develop. And if you're fine with it uncle, I'd love to be together with your daughter".
Only HE does that these days!! I was stunned and my mom was there laughing. Dad was so pleased over that and said yes on my behalf. Geez! However, I'm happy that I made the right choice.
I love him. I love his family. and I love all of his friends. We respect each other's networks and do not try to intrude to one another's personal space. Still, I'd like to believe we always have each other in our minds. :))
18 months, and I wish we'll have millions more days being together. This seems real and I hope for the best future.
xx
Tuesday, 9 August 2011
How I Shared.
Hello!
I have forgotten the point where I left and is confused on where exactly to start! Anyway, my summer break has been a full-filling one up to this point. I've done a lot, contributed a lot and engaged a lot more with people - high and low - knowing what went wrong and how to make them right.
I'd love to share this one story from my own personal experience in Seoul (nope, not about the tragedy just yet) . It's still far from an eyes-opening experience maybe, but I grew up in the process. In fact, I walked so far in such a short time. :)
So when I was in Seoul, I suggested to my grandfather that I would want to seek for a job the normal people do. The unfortunate ones who don't have solid education background, zero connections - basically how those people start from scratch. Knowing him, I got a good lecture on NOT continuing that wish of mine.
I did it anyway. Not because I was stubborn but because I was determined. I've so many friends who came from great families and we all (even myself) have the tendency to forget that a lot more people out there don't have what we have - little to none. Hence, I would like to learn and seek what the real deal is and where real money comes from.
Story begins...
I walked down every street and aisle and it was so hard to get a plain job. Not the extraordinaire corporate jobs, nope! Just a sales assistant maybe or even a store helper. There were so many adverts pasted but no real jobs. Thank god, I got a job on my second day and it was lovely - nope, not the wage - the process was really really hard but I felt like I finally deserved something in my life.
Where I worked : Family Mart.
It's a convenience store operating 24 hours ... something like 7-Eleven in Malaysia and C-Store in New York. And I had to work on shifts thus it got me thinking. How do I commute?? How do they commute?! I didn't know a more brilliant way and the subway isn't very near to my house so I cycled to work every single day.
It was scary at first. Sometimes, my shift finished at 5am and some other times, I had to start work at 2pm (when it's so hot outside) so it was very very challenging not getting help from anyone.
What I did:
Everything!
1) I held a mop for the first time in my life, and I didn't know how to rock it. So my manager got really mad she called me an idiot and threw me the mop back at me.
2) I was taller than the rest of my female colleagues so I got bullied a lot - they kept on asking me to do work, to arrange the items on the higher racks when they could use the available bench.
3) You think it's easy to operate a cash machine? Nope, not so, I would say. I got confused and panicked this one day. Customers were queueing and I couldn't quite manage it and caused a PMS-y colleague to get mad at me for disturbing her at the ladies. Geez, sorry!
4) I also had to do a whole lot of cleaning up. Cans, noodle cups, spilled hot water - it was a lot of work.
5) Managed stocks. I had to count stocks, sometimes the stocks come at the wee hours in the morning so I cannot afford to not focus plus I had to arrange everything in the store room after all that have settled.
What I experienced :
Drunk men, got harassed, they thought I was a joke so they tried to be funny, called for help, ended up shouting so loud I lost my voice after, knock something (I cannot recall) to one of the man's head that had brought him to sanity.... gosh, too many things happened.
Rude customers who would flash their money in front of me and said, "you are just a cashier" and "who do you think you are?". I didn't understand why would anyone do that, really. :( Sad to know it's still happening!
What I loved:
On the last day, I gave everyone a nice, classical purse and everyone thought they were fakes. Ha-ha. It was just a small gesture and even after all that I had gone through (and put to go through) , I respected them for the experience they had given me - probably something none in my network can ever give me! But the real significance of the purse is for them to make that purse as a bench-mark; for them to start saving, for them to create new & better lives and also slotted in some name cards of the people who would help them - education-wise, monetary...
Dare :
Dare you do the same?
1- Instead of condemning, go down to their level and understand what they go through.
You may think they've zero morales - bullying and whatnot but why not try to see the stress and work-load they're put on but paid so minimal and don't get the sense of respect from the community.
2- Who are you?
Instead of saying "who are they?" to them, why not ask, "who are we?". WIthout our families, who are we? Without God's generosity, who are we? Without luck, who are we?
3- Know what you deserve.
Until you make your own penny, you should never judge another person's wealth or be biased about what they can do in life or how far they can go because you don't know and you will never know. Everyone can make money, the only thing that differs them is how much they can make. With our backgrounds, we may can do so much, but with our real efforts, things can become doubtful.
-
I hope I have touched you in one way or another. Pardon me if there were sentences which were too direct or have irritated anyone at all. I'm a human, after all. :)
Really hope to have more time to write in this space in the future. Please leave behind your links to share your space with me as well!
Lots of love,
Freida.
I have forgotten the point where I left and is confused on where exactly to start! Anyway, my summer break has been a full-filling one up to this point. I've done a lot, contributed a lot and engaged a lot more with people - high and low - knowing what went wrong and how to make them right.
I'd love to share this one story from my own personal experience in Seoul (nope, not about the tragedy just yet) . It's still far from an eyes-opening experience maybe, but I grew up in the process. In fact, I walked so far in such a short time. :)
So when I was in Seoul, I suggested to my grandfather that I would want to seek for a job the normal people do. The unfortunate ones who don't have solid education background, zero connections - basically how those people start from scratch. Knowing him, I got a good lecture on NOT continuing that wish of mine.
I did it anyway. Not because I was stubborn but because I was determined. I've so many friends who came from great families and we all (even myself) have the tendency to forget that a lot more people out there don't have what we have - little to none. Hence, I would like to learn and seek what the real deal is and where real money comes from.
Story begins...
I walked down every street and aisle and it was so hard to get a plain job. Not the extraordinaire corporate jobs, nope! Just a sales assistant maybe or even a store helper. There were so many adverts pasted but no real jobs. Thank god, I got a job on my second day and it was lovely - nope, not the wage - the process was really really hard but I felt like I finally deserved something in my life.
Where I worked : Family Mart.
It's a convenience store operating 24 hours ... something like 7-Eleven in Malaysia and C-Store in New York. And I had to work on shifts thus it got me thinking. How do I commute?? How do they commute?! I didn't know a more brilliant way and the subway isn't very near to my house so I cycled to work every single day.
It was scary at first. Sometimes, my shift finished at 5am and some other times, I had to start work at 2pm (when it's so hot outside) so it was very very challenging not getting help from anyone.
What I did:
Everything!
1) I held a mop for the first time in my life, and I didn't know how to rock it. So my manager got really mad she called me an idiot and threw me the mop back at me.
2) I was taller than the rest of my female colleagues so I got bullied a lot - they kept on asking me to do work, to arrange the items on the higher racks when they could use the available bench.
3) You think it's easy to operate a cash machine? Nope, not so, I would say. I got confused and panicked this one day. Customers were queueing and I couldn't quite manage it and caused a PMS-y colleague to get mad at me for disturbing her at the ladies. Geez, sorry!
4) I also had to do a whole lot of cleaning up. Cans, noodle cups, spilled hot water - it was a lot of work.
5) Managed stocks. I had to count stocks, sometimes the stocks come at the wee hours in the morning so I cannot afford to not focus plus I had to arrange everything in the store room after all that have settled.
What I experienced :
Drunk men, got harassed, they thought I was a joke so they tried to be funny, called for help, ended up shouting so loud I lost my voice after, knock something (I cannot recall) to one of the man's head that had brought him to sanity.... gosh, too many things happened.
Rude customers who would flash their money in front of me and said, "you are just a cashier" and "who do you think you are?". I didn't understand why would anyone do that, really. :( Sad to know it's still happening!
What I loved:
On the last day, I gave everyone a nice, classical purse and everyone thought they were fakes. Ha-ha. It was just a small gesture and even after all that I had gone through (and put to go through) , I respected them for the experience they had given me - probably something none in my network can ever give me! But the real significance of the purse is for them to make that purse as a bench-mark; for them to start saving, for them to create new & better lives and also slotted in some name cards of the people who would help them - education-wise, monetary...
Dare :
Dare you do the same?
1- Instead of condemning, go down to their level and understand what they go through.
You may think they've zero morales - bullying and whatnot but why not try to see the stress and work-load they're put on but paid so minimal and don't get the sense of respect from the community.
2- Who are you?
Instead of saying "who are they?" to them, why not ask, "who are we?". WIthout our families, who are we? Without God's generosity, who are we? Without luck, who are we?
3- Know what you deserve.
Until you make your own penny, you should never judge another person's wealth or be biased about what they can do in life or how far they can go because you don't know and you will never know. Everyone can make money, the only thing that differs them is how much they can make. With our backgrounds, we may can do so much, but with our real efforts, things can become doubtful.
-
I hope I have touched you in one way or another. Pardon me if there were sentences which were too direct or have irritated anyone at all. I'm a human, after all. :)
Really hope to have more time to write in this space in the future. Please leave behind your links to share your space with me as well!
Lots of love,
Freida.
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